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The Final Chapter

"The cave you fear to enter is where the treasure lies."

It was quite early in the morning on this New Moon of April 2023.  I was sitting in the basement office and lounge and was responding to a new friend I recently made ~ a lovely man who sold me the magical bracelet.  He mentioned that he would likely be back in this area in September for an event called 'Tantra Fest'.  He asked me if I wanted a link to it.  Before he even sent it, I began exploring what sounded very interesting.

I came across the website called Love and Ecstasy and it was as though I was immediately transported to this other realm, this life where every day feels like it's the best day of your life.  I became consciously aware that I would so often forget what I was really looking for and fall back into 'just getting used to' the life that I have been living for such a long time with the occasional intensive immersions into a whole other reality which I'd experience at multiple day festivals I had been to or perhaps a really fun, long party.

I felt as though my journey was over simply by remembering what I had been looking for all along.

I thought back to the days many years ago when I met a teacher of Tantra.  I do understand that the word 'Tantra' has a number of different meanings.  To me, it fundamentally refers to a practice that is perhaps one of the best ways to get in touch with your deepest feelings.  I took a number of classes with her where we'd do some breath work and meditation and discussion about energy flowing within the body.  I didn't continue.  It's not always so easy getting in touch with our feelings especially when living in a society where so many seem very disconnected from how they actually feel.  If you're not feeling good in a particular situation, you can leave and go somewhere else.  But when you're not aware of how you're feeling, you won't be motivated to figure out how to go somewhere else.  Yes, it's very challenging to get in touch with one's feelings because likely would wake up to the fact that they are not really happy in most areas of their life.  

Yes, getting in touch with feelings can be quite a journey.  I look forward to the day where there are centers that are open all the time where people can go and get in touch with how they really feel.  And, perhaps, find a whole new life.   And there will be a lot of work opportunities as more and more flock to centers like this that are true 'all inclusives' where many services and opportunities are offered to help someone along on that longest journey 

~ from the mind to the heart.

I felt that even if I had to endure a bit more time in the challenging life situation I found myself in, I felt now I had a very clear destination, which, like a lighthouse on shower, which makes it easier not to get distracted.  

I signed up for their four day retreat without hesitation and began to encourage all my good friends to do the same.  Who knows, perhaps I'd end up in the same cabin as some of my amazing friends that I have met along the way.

It seemed as though I was searching for some kind of 'Big Finale' to my epic tale.

While at the same time I was feeling somewhat stuck in my life

Yearning for what felt like a fresh start ~ a new experience of life.

I was in a period of deep reflection on many aspects of my life, how I was spending my time, how I was feeling throughout my days.

I came to the conclusion that 'True Love' was something that

had been missing for so much of my life.

And so, I set my eyes back to where this tale had begun

in the land of Mexico

I had this feeling that there, I would find True Love

What is True Love?

True love is rare

True love is a feeling of oneness

True love heals all pain

True love fills your days with happiness

True love is eternal

True love is what everyone is searching for at their deepest level.

True love may be hard to recognize because we have gotten used to

what we thought true love was.

True love protects you from what is not true

for only true love is true.

I had written 'My Portable Office' when on the South coast of India,

on the Arabian Sea quite a few years ago.

I recall at the time feeling the truth of these words but I didn't have the inner strength to truly live this way.

I felt that now, I was ready to truly step out into the world

and live that life I've been dreaming of for a long time.

One where it was like my 'office' would follow me where ever I flowed.

My Portable Office

All I really need Is a pen

A journal

A portable computer

An internet café

And a publisher

Then I can be anywhere

And still be in my office


I think I’ll sit Under a coconut tree

By the Arabian Sea

In South India

For a while

The rent is really good

And on my breaks

I can swim

In the warm waters

And let the waves Caress me

After a hard day Of work

Yes, I felt that in Mexico, in the warmth of true love,

I'd be able to finally fill in all the chapters that have come before this one


at the same time

writing the first chapters

of the sequel

to this story.

I was truly excited for what was feeling like a New Beginning

It was as though I was about to step into

the spring of my life

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